Welcome to another episode of Wordsmith Wednesday: Strong Opening Paragraphs! I’m your host, Tamara Hogan.
In this monthly feature, we analyze opening paragraphs from both published books and unpublished manuscripts.
Whether we’re talking about the opening paragraphs of a book, of a chapter, or of a scene, the author’s job is the same: ORIENT THE READER, QUICKLY. To me, this means being able to answer the following four questions in fairly short order:
- Who’s the point of view character?
- Where are they? (Setting/world)
- When are they? (Time/era-wise)
- Who else is there? (if anyone)
Don’t make us wait too long! A couple-hundred words, max. Bonus points if the opening paragraphs also convey information about characterization, genre, and the story conflict to come.
This month, longtime blog reader Cynthia Huscroft submits the opening paragraphs of a flash fiction exercise for our impressions and feedback.
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She could hear it in the distance. The ice cream truck was just a couple of blocks away. It took her back to when her grandfather would take her for ice cream to the shop that had been on the corner next to their home. Root beer floats; it was always a root beer float for her.
Now it was different, she thought. Ice cream trucks brought the creamy delights to you. And with that came the terrifying reality of possibly another child being abducted. Today was the eighth. For the past five years the abductions occurred on the eighth of each month the ice cream truck came and made its rounds. Each child vanished without a trace. Each lead took the police to a stone cold end.
The truck reached her block. She walked towards it hyper alert.
“Hey, Stan, how ya doin’?”
“Well, today is the eighth, so not so good.”
“Seen anything suspicious?”
“Nope, it’s been just like every other day so far. The usual?”
“Yes, thanks.” I reached in my pocket for the money but Stan waved it away.
“Not taking your money. The best way to pay me is to find out who is doing this.”
“Thanks, Stan.” I turned, headed to my porch and sat down to watch. To watch and wait and wonder who the next child might be.
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A promising start! 226 ominous, tension-filled words – and despite the dark subject matter, I definitely want a root beer float. 
Your turn, Ruby community!
- Who’s the point of view character?
- Where are they? (Setting/world)
- When are they? (Time/era-wise)
- Who else is there? (if anyone)
- What other information is revealed about genre, world, character, and story conflict?
Craft-wise, what hooks you? Let’s discuss in Comments. Also, feel free to share what you’re reading, what you’re writing, and how you’re doing.
If you’d like to get some personal feedback in an upcoming Strong Opening Paragraphs blog post, please email your opening paragraphs to me at tamara@tamarahogan.com. 200 word maximum, and let me know if you’d like to remain anonymous.
We find ourselves in challenging times, with many of us hitting up our “to be read” piles or re-reading old favorites as a way to relieve some stress, or experience some joy, during The Great Pause.
My triple PRISM-winning paranormal romance debut TASTE ME (Underbelly Chronicles Book 1), about a siren rock star, her grumpy incubus bodyguard, and the bad guy who wants them both, is (still) on sale for $0.99, mainly because I completely forgot to change the price back. E-book buy links can be found at my website: https://www.tamarahogan.com/taste-me/
Stay healthy, everyone!
